Showing posts with label relationship guide. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationship guide. Show all posts

13.4.11

How to Revive Your Relationship

Romantic relationships can be a continuous source of enjoyment and fulfillment if we know how to make our relationships interesting and how to keep the initial spark alive. Although we all have busy schedules and we often feel overwhelmed by our daily responsibilities we must never forget to make love our top priority. Learn how to revive your relationship with the following tips!
At the beginning of a relationship everything seems to be perfect. Partners seem to have a boundless curiosity about each other, passion is the keyword that describes the relationship and the couple has an insatiable desire for closeness and affection. However,with the passage of time things tend to get more difficult because routine settles in and the initial enthusiasm slowly fades away.
As we develop a comfortable way to be with someone,the relationship seems to run on autopilot. Soon,we begin to lose interest, the relationship loses its spark and we become bored. If the situation continues for a long time,lovers might drift apart and even fall out of love. Emotional distance is the most serious symptom that things have began to degenerate.
What can we do to reignite the initial spark?There is no easy answer for this question as people have different personalities and situations are very diverse but there are some things we can do that can help us get back on the right track. Here are a few of those things:

Communicate your desires
The first step in solving any relationship problem is to recognize the problem and to identify its causes. Talk to your partner about the situation you are in and try to determine why the problem appeared.
Think about how your ideal relationship would look like and try to communicate your desires to your partner. Don't expect him to know how to make you happy and be specific about your desires. Try to think about certain things that contributed to your excitement in the first phases your relationship and try to find other things that currently fit your needs. Ask your partner to do the same and then try to find ways to fulfill those needs for both of you.

Express appreciation
One of the deepest cravings ingrained in our subconscious mind is the desire to be appreciated. This craving is universal regardless of our social status,our popularity or our level of success. Reminding our partner why we appreciate him is one of the surest way to improve the relationship.
By showing appreciation we bring positive feelings to the relationship and we increase the chances of being more appreciated ourselves. Remember the law of attraction:the more you focus on the things we want in our life the more we increase the chances of manifesting those things.

Initiate surprises
The element of surprise is one of the first things that fades away in a relationship. To keep the relationship interesting we should always find ways to surprise our partner. Whether you buy tickets for an activity you both enjoy, take him on a date or you plan a surprise party for him it does not matter as long as it is something your partner wouldn't expect. Don't ever underestimate the power of frequent small surprises. They have an amazing power and if you are creative enough they can be one of the most powerful tools you can use to reignite passion.

Dress up for your partner
Men usually appreciate the effort we invest in our appearance. Although we tend to pay attention to our appearance especially in the beginning of the relationship and we dress up only on special occasions it is important to always take care of our appearance. Dressing up for him when it's not special occasion will surely be a pleasant surprise.
Value the time you spend together but make time for your hobbies
It is essential to make the most of the time you spend together and to make sure that you have a good time together but it's also important to make time for your hobbies and give the relationship the space it needs to grow. Encourage your partner to make time for his hobbies and make sure you include some separate activities in your weekly routine.

How to Overcome Jealousy in a Relationship

Few things can ruin a relationship faster than excessive jealousy. While a little jealousy now and then is generally a good thing as it is interpreted as a sign of caring, frequent episodes of jealousy are usually considered as a sign of a controlling personality and insecurity. Learning to deal with jealousy is an essential skill we need to master in order to be able to have healthy romantic relationships.
Unjustified jealousy is the ultimate relationship killer because it attacks the very basis of a healthy relationship, the trust factor. Feelings of jealousy are extremely tormenting both for the person experiencing these feelings as well as for the significant other who is faced with the difficult task of constantly having to reassure his/her loved one and facing distrust and suspicion on a daily basis despite his/her genuine efforts.
Although it might be hard to swallow, the truth is that excessive jealousy is the result of low self esteem and lack of self confidence. Generally, those who have low levels of self-esteem tend to have a dependent personality and have an acute need for constant reassurance and because they often experience feelings of unworthiness they tend to unconsciously sabotage every relationship they are in.
Improve your self-esteem
That's why the first step in solving the problem of jealousy in a relationship is to start developing a self-esteem. You cannot have a healthy romantic relationship without first having a good relationship with yourself.
Once you become aware of your personal worth you become more independent you are no longer paralyzed by the fear that your significant other might leave you because you no longer associate your personal worth with maintaining a certain relationship.
Once you don't base your relationships on need anymore and focus instead on giving the best possible contribution to the relationships and you make decision based on want you want instead of letting fear take over your life, great relationships start to develop.

Control your reactions and communicate with your partner
Avoid jumping to conclusions based on minor events. While this might be one of the hardest things you have to do, it's important to be able to objectively analyze your reactions and know when the jealousy you are feeling is really justified. Talk to your significant other and let him/her know about your feeling without accusing him/her of anything.
Take responsibility for your reactions and calmly tell your significant other if there are some things that she/he can do to help you overcome this problem easier. Your significant other will most likely appreciate the efforts you are making and because with this approach you will be able to keep the communication lines open, your loved one will be more likely to be supportive and understanding, making it easier for both of you to restore trust and revive your relationship.
Try couples therapy
If the situation continues to worsen despite your best efforts it's time to take more radical measures. A careful analysis of the feelings of both partners as well as the the relationship is essential in order to make a final decision. Many couples can find that excessive jealousy has brought the relationship to a critical point and maybe even beyond salvation and that breakup is the only optimal solution.
However, if the feelings are still strong and both partners are willing to deal with the problem, then couples therapy can be really helpful. Try to keep an open mind and accept your feelings without being ashamed of them. Don't be afraid of sharing your feelings and be willing to accept that it might take a lot of time to overcome this problem especially if excessive jealousy is the result of past hurtful experiences.